(Photo credits: Google)

I am not saying I can’t say good things about myself, it’s just that, isn’t it more effective and more reliable if other people share those great qualities of mine as a worker? Rather than convincing a hiring manager or a company about how great of a worker I am? And that I am a good fit for the company?

Just got back from a job Interview!

My interviewer was really professional. He threw great and challenging questions. And did an amazing job with screening an applicant like me.

I learned however that no matter how prepared I am for a job interview, no matter how many videos I watched online, how well I research about the position and the company, I feel like those aren’t enough to confidently say, I got this! I still need to experience many interviews. And that’s okay! It’s part of learning.

During the entire interview process, I made it known to my interviewer that I was extremely nervous. I was that honest! I didn’t want to pretend that I was fine when I wasn’t. Isn’t that the point of an interview, being able to present yourself without pretensions?

I wasn’t nervous because of unpreparedness. I did all my research about the position, watched so many videos about the company, practiced so hard on how to go about with my interview, assumed interview questions and answered it with confidence in front of a mirror, and even watched videos from recruitment professionals on how to ace an interview.

Did it help me? A little bit. But that didn’t took away my nervousness. Despite being willing to share my skills and work ethics, I still get nervous every time I have a face to face interview. And I know I am not alone.

I think I thrive more with panel type interview. Maybe because when there’s more people observing and doing the screening process, there’s a much higher chance of being objectively assessed.

Or maybe, a one on one interview, but a presentation type interview, where the interviewer is a few meters away, and I will be given a few minutes to present everything that the interviewer wants to know. In my own opinion, nervousness decreases greatly with this kind of set up. You don’t feel the pressure of being critically looked at—

I honestly felt that the interviewer was not looking at me, but the smallest particle on my face. I’m exaggarating here, but that feeling was enough to get me distracted.

Face to face interview increases my anxiety level to 100 million. Not because the interviewer might be subjective, but I find it very uncomfortable talking to a person face to face with only a few inches away, and most especially that I am talking about myself, selling myself to the interviewer, convincing them that I am a good fit.

I can compare it to meeting a guy for first time– without even asking for your name, he sat down, he looked at you, he looked interested, then went on asking you challenging, but short questions! Of course you are force to give your best answers but all he did was stare at you intently! It’s a okay for some people, but not for everyone. Well, not me. 😁

Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with being confident about what I can do. I just find it difficult to sell myself to others. It doesn’t mean I am not interested of the position or I can’t deliver a task. I am also fully aware that our world has a system. So for now, let my opinion be just an opinion.

I’ll practice face to face interview until I don’t get nervous anymore.

This is all I can do, for now.

After all, we are all different and thats what makes us unique.